Time for Estate Planning

Nobody likes to think about their own death and what will happen when they are gone.  This is true especially when that person is young.  However, when your young is the best time to plan.  When you are just starting out, it seems that you are usually operating on principles and values rather than allocating actual assets (usually because you have none).  Sometimes we become attached to certain assets and do not want them to leave our hands, especially when our natural heirs are not exactly as we would want them to be.  Moreover, when it comes to the care of your children, the earlier you establish the caregiver the better.  You do not want your children ending up with someone that you did not select.  In short, have the conversations know with your spouse, make the tough decisions, and get it done.  Estate planning is not simply for old people. 

The Disappearing Spouse

What happens when you come home from being out of town and your spouse has cleaned you out and disappeared?  The reaction is typically one of anger and then panic as you realize your life has just changed dramatically.  The worse part is when you have kids and they are also gone.  If there is no communication from your spouse as to where they have gone, this could be a parental kidnapping case and you should call the police.  If you know where your spouse is, call a lawyer and file papers right away.  Divorce is about control in many cases.  If they have the money, kids, and stuff, they have the control.  The only way to get it back is to file for divorce and a motion for temporary orders.  Get the ball rolling so you can get some control back.

Drew

Divorce and Valentines

Should Valentines be a day-off for a divorce attorney?

Enforcing Your Decree

What happens when the divorce is final, but the other side won't live by the terms.  Most decrees contain a mandatory mediation provision prior to resorting to relief from the Court.  Thus, the first step is to make a demand for mediation.  If mediation fails or the other party refuses to participate in mediation, you must file an order to show cause with the court.  This means the other party will have to answer to the court the allegations that you make against them for not following the decree.  These motions are quite frequent and often necessary to force the other party to deal with the issue.  You must know what specific relief you are seeking from the Court to make your motion successful.  When it comes to child support and parent-time issues, it is important to see it through so that there can be an actual finding of contempt.  This will strengthen your case later for harsher penalties and even for a change of custody should parent-time continue to be denied.  In other words, on the small stuff, mediation hopefully will work.  On larger issues, do what you need to do to enforce the decree to the letter.

Dollars and Sense of Divorce

Divorces can be costly!  Sometimes you need the divorce that you can afford rather than the divorce that you want.  This is often very hard to accept when the reality of how expensive a divorce is hits you.  It is especially hard when you factor in that lawyers are time brokers.  All we have to provide for ourselves is our brains and the time it takes us to do something.  This financial reality can create a tension in any attorney/client relationship.  A divorce attorney should sit down with their client and walk them through the dollars and sense of the divorce process.  An honest upfront appraisal of the costs associated with the battle and the likelihood of the outcome creates a workable relationship between the attorney and the client.  This makes sense when it is your dollars.

Alimony and Divorce

Alimony in Utah is always a bitter issue.  The ex-husband always dislikes the idea of having to support his ex-wife from his hard earned money.  This is especially true when alimony is for a long period.  The ex-wife feels that his attitude about support is a slap in the face because she supported him throughout the marriage.  Adding to the bitterness is that there is no magic formula for alimony.  One party claims they cannot afford it and the other claims that they cannot live without it.  The lack of a standard adds to the bitterness.  While there are many formulas out there to calculate alimony, these formulas often do not take into account the human aspects of alimony.  The question is . . . should they take into account the human aspects or should alimony simply be dollars and sense?